Latest Articles: 4play
Woman Kills Three For Last X-Box at Chicago Wal-Mart
Post Date: 2013-12-02 15:45:04 by X-15
6 Comments
A woman was arrested today for stabbing to death three shoppers at a Chicago-area Wal-Mart in order to secure the store's last X-Box One. Mary Robbins, a married mother of two, reportedly wrestled her competitors to the ground before fatally wounding them with a sharpened Phillips head screwdriver. The victim's names have not yet been released, but are said to include a sociology student at Northwestern University, a chemistry teacher at at local high school and a young pregnant woman buying a system for her brother. Robbins fled the scene and was apprehended at home hours later after police identified her license plates on the store's surveillance camera. Although many are ...
Do You Remember?
Post Date: 2013-12-01 19:57:46 by James Deffenbach
4 Comments
Right To Bear-Madison Rising (pro 2nd Amend rock)
Post Date: 2013-12-01 02:16:04 by farmfriend
3 Comments
An Old, Old Joke
Post Date: 2013-11-30 15:00:24 by Turtle
1 Comments
I read this joke as a kid. It must be ancient, but it's still funny. A high-school biology teacher asks Miss Smith, "What organ of the body enlarges to ten times its normal size during periods of excitement?" Miss Smith stammers and blushes and looks at the floor and says, "I don't want to answer that question." The teachers turns to Mr. Jones and asks the same question. "The pupil of the eye," answers Mr. Jones. "That's correct," says the teacher. Then the teacher turns to Miss Smith and says, "Two things are obvious, Miss Smith. The first is that you didn't study your lesson last night. The second is that your wedding ...
Knockout Game Explained By Philosophers From Zeno To Heidegger
Post Date: 2013-11-26 13:56:30 by X-15
1 Comments
Can we just exhaust all epistemic uncertainties right now and be done with it? Thumbing through my History of Western Philosophy, here is a crib sheet for the benefit of the Reality-based Community: pre-Socratic: The knockout game is impossible because a fist would have to traverse an infinite number of infinitesimally small spaces just to reach a head. Socratic: Those who admit they know nothing about the knockout game are wiser than those who think they do. Aristotelian: No man can be called happy until he has died never having suffered the knockout game. Scholastic: The knockout game is mentioned in neither the Bible or the Greek philosophers [sic- bad, second-hand translation from ...
17 Ancient Abandoned Websites That Still Work
Post Date: 2013-11-23 19:06:42 by X-15
3 Comments
1. Space Jam (1996) 2. Internet Explorer Is Evil (1998) 3. Ask Dr. Internet (1996) 4. Three Rivers Stadium (1998) 5. Fogcam! (1994) 6. You've Got Mail (1998) 7. Strawberry Pop-Tart Blow-Torches (1994) 8. The Robert DeNiro Page (1999) 9. Klingon Language Institute (1996) 10. CNN's O.J. Simpson Trial Page (1996) 11. Welcome To Netscape (1994) 12. Fantasy Baseball Home Page (1996) 13. Washington Post's "Year In Review" (1996) 14. Arngren (2004) 15. Bob Dole/Jack Kemp Presidential Campaign (1996) 16. Amanda Please (2002) 17. Zombo (1999)
Short Change Hero
Post Date: 2013-11-23 13:39:13 by James Deffenbach
11 Comments
The name is McTull, thank you
Post Date: 2013-11-20 15:27:58 by Jethro Tull
15 Comments
It's official, I'm a dual Irish citizen. In fact I'm a citizen of the European union, which includes the following countries; The ultimate 'Get out of Dodge' piece is now in place for yours truly. Up the rebels!
TIPS FROM THE REDNECK BOOK OF MANNERS
Post Date: 2013-11-18 20:42:13 by farmfriend
6 Comments
TIPS FROM THE REDNECK BOOK OF MANNERS 1. Never take a beer to a job interview. 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. 3. It's considered poor taste to take a cooler to church. 4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets. 5. Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home. DINING OUT 1. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label. 2. Avoid throwing bones and food scraps on the floor as the restaurant may not have dogs. ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME 1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared ...
Thanksgiving 2022
Post Date: 2013-11-16 21:10:47 by farmfriend
2 Comments
Poster Comment:Thanksgiving 2022 "Winston, come into the dining room, it's time to eat," Julia yelled to her husband. "In a minute, honey, it's a tie score," he answered. Actually Winston wasn't very interested in the traditional holiday football game between Detroit and Washington. Ever since the government passed the Civility in Sports Statute of 2017, outlawing tackle football for its "unseemly violence" and the "bad" example it sets for the rest of the world", Winston was far less of a football fan than he used to be. Two-hand touch wasn't nearly as exciting. Yet it wasn't the game that Winston was uninterested in. It ...
Mountain Twerker....
Post Date: 2013-11-16 17:07:54 by X-15
4 Comments
Poster Comment:Don't ask me how I found this :)
Claim: World's First Vegan Condom
Post Date: 2013-11-14 19:03:18 by X-15
3 Comments
With the help of a 22 second Ad promo that is garnering quite a bit of attention for its message, an Australian company, Glyde, claims to have created the world's only certified ethical, vegan and Fair Trade condom. Furthermore, the manufacturers say it has never been tested on animals. In the Ad "Animals," romantic lighting and sultry music provide the vibe for a scantily clad beauty who seductively delivers the following message: "There are a million ways to pleasure a woman. You can use your hands. Your mouth. Even toys."But you wouldn't f**k me with something that's been inside a horse, would you?" According to their website, Maxi * Extra Large ...
Tears Came Out of Turtle's Eyes
Post Date: 2013-11-13 12:50:38 by Turtle
2 Comments
Obamacare
Post Date: 2013-11-12 15:10:10 by christine
1 Comments
This just came in.... Choosing a Username at HealthCare.org "You must enter a password to proceed." -roses "Sorry, too few characters." -pretty roses "Sorry, you must use at least one numerical character." -1 pretty rose "Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces." -1prettyrose "Sorry, you must use at least 10 different characters." -1fuckingprettyrose "Sorry, you must use at least one upper case character." -1FUCKINGprettyrose "Sorry, you cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively." -1FuckingPrettyRose "Sorry, you must use no fewer than 20 total characters." - ...
Epic Jedi Knight
Post Date: 2013-11-12 09:50:47 by Turtle
2 Comments
Russian Man Nails Testicles To Street To Protest The Police State
Post Date: 2013-11-11 17:29:45 by Jethro Tull
7 Comments
Russian Man Nails Testicles To Street To Protest The Police State 16 hours ago | International, Politics | Posted by Kristin Tate November 11, 2013 // Some people dislike the police state more than others. Russian artist Pyotr Pavlensky really dislikes the police state. On Sunday, Pavlensky stripped naked and nailed his testicles to a Red Square cobblestone to protest the Kremlin’s crackdown on political rights. His stunt took place on Russia’s annual holiday, “Police Day.” The artist, who is from Saint Petersburg, said on Grani.ru that he was attempting to draw attention to Russia’s growing “police state.” Well, he certainly drew ...
Spiders on drugs
Post Date: 2013-11-09 11:25:21 by X-15
4 Comments
Jethro Tull
Post Date: 2013-11-08 09:09:57 by christine
37 Comments
Poster Comment:Happy Birthday* :)
The Brillunce of Turtle
Post Date: 2013-11-07 10:39:58 by Turtle
10 Comments
Actually it's the brilliance of YouTube and the internet. The security light came on on my 1999 Chevy Lumina. The mechanics I called quoted right at $300 (and the dealer $500) to fix the problem, which was changing the lock cylinder (which I can do but never have done). When I checked on YouTube a bunch of guys said no, no, no, cut the orange wire under the dash (which goes to that crappy Vehicle Anti-Theft system), solder in enough resistors to match the resistor in the key, and you're done. So I did it and the light went out. The car runs fine. Cost: $10 for a 500 multipack of resistors, $5 for solder. I already had a $30 multimeter to test resistance and a cigarette lighter ...
Meet Mr. Balls, Brazil’s Disturbing New Testicular Cancer Mascot
Post Date: 2013-11-01 19:04:43 by Jethro Tull
3 Comments
Meet Mr. Balls, Brazil’s Disturbing New Testicular Cancer Mascot Posted by Jeff Cormier on Thursday, October 24, 2013 · Leave a Comment A Brazilian testicular cancer awareness group has created a mascot for the cause that is beyond disturbing. Say hello to Mr. Balls, or “Senhor Testiculo”, the wide-eyed, dual-toothed, rosy-cheeked, mole-sporting scrotum that will cause a lifetime of nightmares for anyone who lays eyes on him. The little curly hairs are an especially nice touch. [NY Daily News]
Turtle's Favorite Joke
Post Date: 2013-10-31 14:32:24 by Turtle
5 Comments
I want my country back songs
Post Date: 2013-10-30 18:42:11 by Jethro Tull
8 Comments
Poster Comment:Catch the rifle hanging over the fireplace.
Backlash over Beijing police tips for women drivers
Post Date: 2013-10-30 18:19:45 by Dakmar
2 Comments
BEIJING: Don’t wear high heels while driving. Make sure you release the handbrake before setting off. And don’t panic if you suddenly realise you’re going the wrong way. Those are some of the suggestions given by the Beijing police department to women drivers in a series of microblog postings that have sparked a backlash among Chinese Internet users who say the tips are sexually discriminatory. “Some women drivers lack a sense of direction, and while driving a car, they often hesitate and are indecisive about which road they should take,” reads one of the suggestions, posted on the police department’s official microblog late Tuesday. Women drivers, the ...
What Men Want: Condoms That Fit
Post Date: 2013-10-30 16:57:46 by X-15
16 Comments
Many men want more condom sizes, new research suggests. When offered more than the usual range of options, many men seek a more customized fit, according to a study published in July in the journal Sexual Health. Only about 1 in 7 men go with the standard sizes offered in the United States. However, one of the study co-authors is the CEO of the company that sold the condoms, and the study was based on the first 1,000 men who bought the company's condoms on the Internet, so it may be hard to draw conclusions about the preferences of the general population. Range of sizes Even so, a recent study found that the average penis size is about 5.56 inches (14.12 centimeters), but there is ...
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